Walk Your Own Way

“I don’t know where all the rivers run. I don’t know how far. I don’t know how come. But I am gonna die believin’ each step that I take ain’t worth the ground that I walk on if we don’t walk it our own way.” From the song Bang A Drum

I once was a follower. I was afraid to do things my own way. I was afraid of being wrong or offending someone. Then one day I heard Chris LeDoux sing these words and it caused an awakening in me that changed my life.

I did a lot of soul searching and looked back at my life in a new way. A way that I had never really imagined.

I will admit that I am hardheaded and by far I am not the sharpest tool in the shed but I realized I had the right to do things and believe the way I wanted too. Right, wrong or indifferent I should believe in me.

There are those who will try to make me believe I wasn’t able to make the right decisions on my own. That I would fail if I didn’t listen to the majority that instituted what they believed to be right for me. News flash, the majority isn’t always right.

I thought to myself how could these people tell me what was right for me when they had never experienced my heartaches, my celebrations and other life experiences. We can’t let people live our lives for us. We need to walk this world in our own way.

It was one of the most important changes I made in my life. It raised my self esteem to new heights. I finally felt like somebody. Don’t get me wrong. Yes I made bad decisions and choices and still do but I made them. No one else did and most importantly I learned from those mistakes and couldn’t blame anyone but myself.

No matter what you do in life or what decision you make there is always going to be someone who disagrees with you. It is inevitable. What is important is how you handle the situation. Do you cower and relinquish your opinion to please those people or do you stand up for what YOU believe in and stand your ground?

As for me I am going to fight for what I believe in even if I stand alone. Maybe it is because I have grown older but I really don’t care what people think of me any longer. I have walked the earth long enough to know that I am never going to please everyone and not everyone is going to agree with me. Not everyone will like my writing or political views. Not everyone will like my photography or my horseshoe art. What is important is how I handle it and that I always “walk it my own way”. If we don’t learn to believe in ourselves we do our spirit, soul and our being a great injustice.

Thanks for taking the time to read my blog. It is so deeply appreciated. You may agree or not agree with my opinion but if you don’t I respect that because we all are entitled to our opinion. We don’t however have the right to demean, harass, or stoop to name calling if we disagree which seems to be the norm for so many people.

Remember to spread the love and be kind to one another. Kindness doesn’t cost anyone anything.

Know Yourself

To know yourself as the Being underneath the thinker, the stillness underneath the mental noise, the love and joy underneath the pain, is freedom, salvation, enlightenment.” – Eckhart Tolle

How well do we really know ourselves?  How much time do we spend on getting to know ourselves?

On the other hand we spend a lot of time trying to get to know others.  We become infatuated by someone and begin having feelings for them and we begin the task of getting to know them better.  We want to know what makes them tick, their likes and dislikes and anything we can find out to help our cause to win their hearts over.  We spend all of this time and energy not realizing that we need to be getting to know ourselves.

I feel the majority of people have forgotten to take the time to know themselves.   Not knowing yourself can be very detrimental to any relationship.  Knowing yourself adds so much depth to a relationship.  If you know what you want out of life and stay true to not accepting anything less you are going to have a better chance of having a healthy relationship.

That is why it is so important to know yourself.  Go to your safe place, meditate, search your soul, whatever works for you and know yourself.  Nurture your self esteem and most of all learn to believe in yourself.  Know what you want and don’t lose site of your dreams.  It is your life now take charge of it.

“The most difficult thing in life is to know yourself.” – Thale

If you want a white picket fence in the country and the person of interest in your life wants a loft apartment in the city, NEWSFLASH!, the odds are very slim that it will ever work even if you are willing to compromise because some day there is going to be an argument and someone is going to say “I gave up everything I wanted in life to make you happy!”.

Why should we settle for anything less than happiness?  I don’t give a rat’s arse what folks have told you but we all deserve happiness.  However there is a “catch 22”.  It is your responsibility to find it, not anyone else.  The first action needed in this adventure down life’s highway is for you to know yourself and find your destination.

“The better you know yourself,  the better your relationship with the rest of the world.” – Toni Collette

There is the old joke that a woman marries a man thinking, I can change him.  A man marries a woman thinking, I don’t want her to ever change ’cause I love her the way she is.

Now once again, I am not a counselor, no degree or education as a counselor.  I am just someone that has lived life.  First I want to clarify that compromise isn’t out of the question but it has to be for the right reason.  I know I have heard people say that their counselor told them they needed to come to a compromise.  These were married people who had a lot of blood, sweat and tears invested in their marriage.  At that point it could be a good thing depending on the individuals, situation and many other variables.  That is another blog.

My personal opinion is that individuals need to know themselves before they become serious about a relationship.  If you want a Tom Selleck/ Jenifer Aniston then by all means set your goal and don’t waiver.  Now this example is somewhat radical but I am just trying to get a point across.  Know what you want in life, stay focused and don’t waiver.  You owe that to yourself.  You deserve happiness and compromise dilutes that.

“Until you make peace with who you are, you’ll never be content with what you have.” – Doris Mortman

I hope my blog has made sense to everyone.  I thank you for taking the time to read it.  Remember to Spread the love.